You can have everything you want, you just can’t have it all at once.
Do you ever wonder, “What the hell am I doing with my life?” Yea, me too. Most recently this past weekend, but if there’s any one thing I can say I’ve learned is to “just keep going.”
I think this can be applied to anyone at any point in their life, actors and improvisers included. The biggest issue I run into, and I know I’m not the only one, is that I want everything. I’m not talking about materialistic things, I’m talking about the abstract things that are, in some ways, still tangible. I want to figure out what I love and I want to do it. Not only do I want to do it, I want to be good at it, great even. I want to be responsible and have a future. I want relationships, real relationships that matter and last. I want to like multiple things and have time to enjoy them. But how?
I heard someone once say, “You can have everything you want, you just can’t have it all at once.” I think there’s a lot of truth to that. We are all in control of our own lives, even though it may not seem like it at times, we are. But for those of us trying to juggle so many different facets of life, how do we find happiness and balance with what we have and what we’re able to do without “having to settle?” How do we continue to “yes and” our lives without burning out? TJ Jagodowski summed all of this up in a comment about the challenges with improv. He said,”The easy thing about improvisation is that we’ve done it already. We’ve lived this far. The hard thing is that all improvisation wants…is all of that.” Harness who you are, your honesty, your vulnerability and be willing and able to release it on stage at any given moment. Sure, no problem.
So, you can’t be great at improv if you’re not great at life. If you’re like me, you might be wondering, “Shit. Well, I want to be great at life because life is great, but I’m too busy seeing improv shows, going to improv classes, reading improv books and playing improv games all trying to get better at improv. How do I have time to experience and enjoy ‘real life’ stuff?” I don’t have the answer, but what I do know is what a number of improvisers I’ve interviewed have told me, and that is to just keep going.
It reminds me of Forrest Gump. Forrest Gump, when he was young, had braces on his legs just so he could learn to walk right. Sure, it was hard, he was teased and he took smaller steps than everyone else, but he had to. He had to put in the work at the beginning to learn how to turn his waddle into a stride. But you know what? Every day he tried, he got stronger. Every day he learned something new and when the time came, he waddled and then he walked and then he jogged and, well you know, then he was runniinnngg. I mean, it’s true. It just takes a bit of perspective to realize that sometimes.
When I interviewed Eleanor Hollingsworth, she referenced something she heard Rachel Dratch say during a visit to Second City, which was actually in response to a question Ayala Skopp asked, which was if there was ever a point when she was going to give up. As Eleanor paraphrased, Rachel had said no, because every year things just kept coming that she didn’t have the year before and after a little while, you step out of this whirlwind and look back and realize, “Wow, I’ve done a lot” or “Look where I’ve landed.” I know that is also the response from a number of reputable improvisers: Colleen Doyle, Jessica Rogers, Eleanor Hollingsworth, TJ Jagodowski and the list goes on. Just keep “runnin'” until it’s not fun anymore.
One thing I have found helpful in trying to balance life is learning to juggle and juggle with time management in mind. Now, I can’t actually juggle in real life, but a former boss once told me the key to juggling is to just keep throwing. Never let any one thing sit too long and don’t hold on to it. Catch it, address it and throw it back. So I guess that would be my recommendation. Figure out what you want, understand (or at least try to understand) what you need to do to get it and then just dive in. Keep opening doors for yourself, don’t expect anyone else to be chivalrous and if you’re lucky they just might surprise you with their generosity. Keep your focus on what you want, but use a wide angled lens so you don’t isolate yourself from opportunities that might creep up on the side. You’ll be fine. I’ll be fine. We’ll all be fine. We just have to be like Forrest and keep “runnin’.”
